Bite The Bully

So how many of you have ever had your child come home with stuff missing, complaints about not having had lunch that day, unusually irritable or sullen, missing assignments, etc.?  What is your response when on a random, unrelated day at an unannounced time, he/she 'happens' to mention that that kid in class who is 'always bothering me' did something...again and that it happened before but you never even knew?

Most people might say " well as the Dad, you gotta show him how to be tough and put that boy in his place and blah blah...."   But how many of you, before responding would think to PRAY about his weaknesses so that God can reveal where the real fault lies?   We think the world of our children and that most times, they can do no wrong.  But are we willing to find out that maybe he/she is or has something to change?  This doesn't mean that all teachers are right and all kids are wrong or that your child is always right and other kids are always wrong.  What it does mean, however, is that when you parent school age children, you must also realize that their influences are so diverse in the time that you're not with them that sometimes, you just don't know.  But God does...

And this is not a Daddy exclusive problem; there are some single moms who have to wrestle with "which parent do I need to be right now - the lover or the fighter?  the tough or the tender?" when there is no Daddy to help make that choice more obvious.  There is a reason why a relationship with the Creator is critical in these times.  He sees the beginning, middle and the end of every circumstance.  What we fail to realize when we operate without Him is that these situations were designed as much for you as well as your children; to shape and mold their character and yours.

As the leader of the home, a man must make a spiritual decision on how to fight and win those battles for our kids.  The emotional approach most often invites factors into the mix that never existed in the first place and people get hurt.  When the woman is the leader of the home, those men out there looking on should learn from their struggle exactly what they are not doing in certain situations.  So when a woman has an attitude with you because you're not there for little Billy or Suzy - but think  you think you're "there" as a parent because your checks and your visitation schedule is on point -like clockwork- but your empathy for to the day-to-day is absent, THAT's what she's talking about.

What do you think and how would you and do you deal?

Welcome to My World!

Hey Y'all,

Welcome to "About The Baby Daddy...."  This is the place you want to come to unload your drama with that other mama and get some real help with some of those real issues.  This blog is about REAL TALK -straight up.  I know you FEEL stuff..but you might just be tryin' to do the right thing.  This is not the mama-bashing spot; nor is it the 'I am man- worship me' spot either.   I just think that one of the biggest challenges for the men in this lifestyle is to be viewed as honest, legit and just as emotionally challenged by a new baby as women are.  It just looks different on us.  That's just one of the many things that people may not know About The Baby Daddy.  I'm looking for all of you brothers out there who know what I'm talkin' about to come forward and let the sisters know About The Baby Daddy - who is he? where's he from? what does his life look like? Is he really unemployed and destitute or shiftless?  What is REALLY true?

 And for the ladies....I'd like you to talk about what YOU believe and what you DON'T ( and why?) - the guys need to hear it and get sober.  Each side will develop the listening skills that are needed when emotions are high and spirituality is LOWWWWW.   So yes, about that spiritual thing...  we will talk about what the bible says in a really practical way; in this way, we can come to grips with the fact that in the midst of all of these conflicts and challenges, more than anything, we need the ability to step back and see who the enemy is NOT - each other.  For the sake of our children, parenting -like marriage - is for life and we would do well to avail ourselves of the tools that will get us through the long haul.

 So spread the word!   We here and we're ready!  Welcome to my world!

Peace,

V